Monday, June 24, 2013

Dark & Cloudy With Little Light


Last night I couldn't sleep....so what else is new?  After tossing and turning I decided to get up and go sit on the back porch, that usually lulls me to sleep, or at least settles my thoughts.  I think it is the quietness of the night with an occasional bird chirp (a bird with insomnia too?) that calms my soul.

I received some bad news on Friday about my sweetie.  The Memory Care facility that I raved about last week has informed me (gently) that they can no longer care for my husband.  He now requires constant supervision, he can no longer do anything for himself, including eating....he continues to fall frequently without injuries so far, he is entering the last stages of Alzheimers.  If he was confined to a wheel chair that would be a different story, but because he is so mobile, they do not have the staff to care for him.  I now must find a nursing home to care for him for his safety.  Something that I had hoped and prayed would never happen.  The staff will assist me in finding this place, they will go with me on my search and when the decision is made they will transfer him to his new home.  My heart aches, I feel like the image above....dark & cloudy with little light.

"You cannot prevent the birds of sadness from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from nesting in your hair."  ~  Chinese Proverb

Until next time.....

32 comments:

  1. God Bless You. may he hold your hands during this time of finding the best place for your sweetie. i know it is so tough. glad to hear that the facility will help you and hopefully will take off some of the pressure and stress from your shoulders. prayers, many prayers are coming your way. big big hugs. ( :

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  2. Oh Deanna, I am so sad to hear this. Praying that you can find a wonderful place to care for your sweetie. I'm glad that the facility will help you find the right place.
    God Bless you both.

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  3. i am so very sorry. indeed, you had every reason to be up and sleepless. i know your heart aches...

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  4. Deanna, so much to think about no wonder you couldn't sleep, so sorry you have to go through this. Thank goodness the home will help you with the transfer and help in the process. That is one good home.

    Thinking of you in the days ahead. God Bless You.

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  5. No wonder you have insomnia! I am so saddened to hear of the latest news of your sweetie. Praying you will be led to a better care facility soon. God bless you and your husband and may he watch over you both.

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  6. Oh Deanna, my heart is saddened with your news. Your photo is prefect for reflecting your feelings. Please know I will be praying for you and your hubby.

    Love and hugs!

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  7. {{{HUGS}}} God Bless you. I'm praying for you.

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  8. Oh Deanna, I am so, so sorry. This is so hard I know as I traveled this path with my father.
    No wonder you can't sleep. I will keep you in my prayers. xxoo

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  9. I just can't imagine what you must be going through ..... watching him go through this horrible disease must be excruciating!!
    It's no wonder you have sleepless nights **hugs**
    But you have captured a beautiful shot of the moon.

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  10. I don't think I can even imagine how difficult this must be for you. I am glad that his current facility will be doing so much to help you with the move. I am sending prayers.

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  11. I'm so sorry......this has got to be the lowest point of your entire life. My thoughts and prayers are with both you and your family in this trying time. Hugs.

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  12. I am so sorry. No wonder you're having trouble sleeping. I know this must hurt your heart. I hope that it will help that the memory care staff will help you in finding another place for your husband. I will be thinking about you as you take this next step in your journey.

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  13. Sad, sad news. I just can't imagine what you must be going through, and it's no wonder you have sleepless nights. Praying for strength to endure this difficult time.

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  14. Having walked that same walk, my heart is breaking for you. Just know that you have lots of prayers and best wishes. God bless.

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  15. Prayers for you and your hubby. I hope you can find a good nursing home for him.

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  16. Deanna, am thinking of you glad you will have support in choosing the right place....

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  17. I hope you find a good safe place for him with the help of the staff. Surely, they know his needs at this point and can suggest a facility that will offer the best care. I'd be sleepless, too. I hope that glorious moon made you feel a bit better.

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  18. I'm sending you my prayers during this difficult time. I'm sorry you are going through this, and am so glad that you will have some help locating a new home for your husband. All my best wishes are with you.

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  19. I'm so sorry, Deanna! Keeping you in my prayers. xo

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  20. You have not left my thoughts ... xoxo

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  21. Words cannot even begin to express what I feel for you right now. Please know that you are in my prayers - for peace, for understanding, for strength - for ALL of you as you continue on this journey.
    Many, many hugs to you & your kids as you work through these very tough decisions and prayers for your sweetie that he is not in pain or suffering.
    Aaaaggghhhhh ----- just wish I could reach through this screen & hug you right now......

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  22. dear deanna...i'm so sorry. can't imagine how difficult this must be for you. just know that we are all lifting you and your sweetie up in our prayers. love,kelly

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  23. Oh Deanna, i can realy understand an feel with you. You are in my thoughts.
    Love Patricia

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  24. amazing the photograph that you took, I could not consider taking photos last night because it's too darn cold out there. It is a difficult time for you again though I'm glad you have the staff of the facility who will have the right contacts and opportunities to help make this next transition as stress-free as possible. You're both in my thoughts

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  25. I'm so sorry, Deanna. My heart aches for you. I, too, have insomnia due to my mom's disease. When I wake during the night she's my first thought and everything is worse in the middle of the night, then my thoughts go to my failures as a mom/wife and I get further depressed and then can't fall back asleep. Love love love to you, Becky

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  26. I am so sorry my friend.. I can't image what you are going through.. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers..

    Hugs~

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  27. I don't know what to say, except I am so sorry, Deanna.

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  28. Oh my, what sad news, Deanna! I'm so sorry and words really fail me here, so I'm sending big warm hugs!

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  29. I'm so sorry, Deanna. You are in my thoughts and prayers. (((Hugs)))

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  30. Prayers and Good Luck Wishes to you Deanna. I am so sorry to hear of your sad news. At least the Memory Care facility is willing to help you with the next step.

    Sounds like you had a great time meeting 2 new friends. Itally ... cooking and photography ... yay for you!

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  31. It doesn't get much rougher, does it? My prayers that just the right will be found.

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  32. Oh Deanna....I'm so right there with you and know how disruptive a move like this is. My heart goes out to you in the hopes that you are able to find a wonderful, caring place for your beloved.
    xo

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